7th May, 1989
In the twilight of the evening there was never a time that Dennis did not doubt his sanity, unless of course his own dazed imaginings unothodoxically perturbed his delusive mind.
In this half-maddened dreaming, his thoughts turned to Stephanie's hairy armpits of German women back when he was little. These women were nothing compared to his experience with Anja, the Swedish masseuse who once was taught by the original masseuse, Olga, who by a strange coincidence was eaten by a ferocious slug in her youth. Anja managed well with only one arm, however, and overcame this by borrowing one of Olga's. Olga didn't mind, as she was on drugs at the time. Intravenous heroin was pumped into her at a rate of 12 gallons per hour causing her to speak with an American accent. This caused much confusion in the building upstairs, which promptly collapsed killing all inside.
Further on down the road a large armpit hair was seen driving a stolen car, licence number BLT-864, and any person or persons who know the whereabouts of the squid missing from the aquarium. ``We think it's an inside job'', the seargent said, water dripping down from her police-issue cap, ``No-one else would have known about the electrolyte requirements''.
This can be very nasty when sitting down on a long piece of dried elderberry bush. Even more so when this bush is in fact an annoyed hedgehog called Dennis. Unfortunately, a rather large rotary elderberry picker slashed the elderberry bush in to a corner where it remained until Patrick entered from a previous story and turned the universe back on with a bang. The Big Bang! He was now forty, and Cheryl had grown up and gone off to Uni, where she was studying the wave-harmonic theory of magnetohydrodynamically-induced ion-dissociation techniques for retarding under-arm hair growth, but they decided that shaving was much easier but it did have some side-effects. Most of these side-effects could be obviated by soaking the particular organ in sulphuric acid and removing it altogether.
However for those of you not worried about armpit hair, it should not worry you!